Alexa Loves The Influenza Bloggers

I really don’t have any idea who Alexa is, but I think she’s in love with us guys. Can you imagine, our Alexa rank is now 5,329,298! Wow! That’s really great.

I got it from a very reliable source (unnamed of course to protect her identity) that having that rank means the influenza bloggers blog is now receiving 5 million visitors daily! Wow, can you imagine that? That’s just awesome!

I investigated further and noted that the average time that each visitor spends on this site is 11 minutes. So you multiply that by 5M, that’s like, the end of the world! OMG!

And you know how important Alexa is, right? Right?

I’m not really sure myself but it must be important, otherwise we won’t be talking about it.

Anyway, last night, four influenza bloggers decided to wet their horns and had a really long discussion about politics, religion, sex, and of course quantum physics. There was even a heated debate on whether Loop Quantum Gravity better unites quantum mechanics with general relativity than the String Theory. Of course I just made that up.

Doc Z was spewing poetry all the time while Bloggista was doing his darnedest to convince the Doc to insert keywords in his poetry for SEO purposes. The Ceblogger was thoughtful (as is usually the case), perhaps pondering on the theological ramifications of Doc Z’s poetry and how he can perhaps leverage on those honeyed words to alleviate the spiritual suffering of every person in the universe. Of course I was only thinking about sex.

Do you know how addicted you are to search engine optimization? Everytime you speak, you stuff your sentences with a lot of keywords. lol.

Bloggista also displayed his SEO skills last night. I should know because everytime Bloggista speaks, the people sitting in other tables around us would suddenly be quiet and strain their necks towards our direction. That my dear pornographic friends is called traffic generation. Which is further proof that si Bloggista ay hindi lang pampamilya, pang-isports pa.

Of course the night had to end. And after consuming almost a truckload of beer we had to stand up, which prompted the people around us to issue a collective “AWWWW”. I even saw one of the waitresses in the corner sobbing as if her heart would break. It was the same waitress who was trying to get Doc Z’s autograph for hours.

And that was the honest-to-goodness account of what happened last night.

21 Responses to Alexa Loves The Influenza Bloggers

  1. reyjr says:

    woot! Panalo.
    When’s the next one? :p

  2. w8sgfx says:

    Kung sinama niyo ako, I would have been the megaphone of the night

  3. Roy says:

    hahaha! what a report!

    I love it!

  4. mizdi says:

    Cracked me up..congratulations!… i’m hard to please..

    Seriously i liked the way u described the scenes, like how the other people on other tables craned their necks to your direction to hear what’s going on. And as u all huddled around that table each one contributing his talent for the sake of coming up with… why were u there in the first place? nevermind.. i liked it anyway.

    (Ahh yes, to partake into some serious political, religious and scientific and discussions while under the influence of beer)

    Way to go.. keep it up!

  5. jan geronimo says:

    Is that Alexa on the header?

    No wonder you guys are anxious to wet your horns. πŸ™‚ Way to go influenzers. lols

  6. zorlone says:

    I am quite sure that you noticed that there were flashes from the cameras last night. No, not just from Ceblogger’s camera phone, there were a couple of guys taking pictures of “us!” It made me think about the sexy lady trying her best to persuade Bloggista to get a free cigarette (and succeeded), she even took his number! I wonder if that was celfone number 1, 2, 3, or 4 (as lyle would put it).


  7. ceblogger says:

    rey and jan, next time we’ll be next week. contact doc z for details. and don’t forget to bring swimming trunks.

  8. jan geronimo says:

    Doc Z, point of clarification lang: someone has got Bloggista’s number? Di ba naman siya nanghina? Awww.

  9. […] you wish that I write about Naruto? Go to hell. If I write as well as this awesome Influenza Blogger, IΒ  just might humor you with a post about it. Not until then […]

  10. jan geronimo says:

    Oh, a visitation from Netherland’s Most Exalted Tulip @mizdi. Indeed, Influenza Bloggers is coming up in the world.

    All those brainstorming sessions in aid of slaking that thirst for beer are starting to pay off. Yeehaw.

  11. DavaoBase says:

    Hey there! Found this site through Jan’s Writing To Exhale blog. πŸ™‚

    Anyway, I’m not here to burst your bubble, but I think you got the Alexa rank wrong. Based on what I read from the Alexa website:

    “The rank is calculated using a combination of average daily visitors and pageviews over the past 3 months. The site with the highest combination of visitors and pageviews is ranked #1”.

    In short, you will want to have a smaller number as your Alexa rank. πŸ™‚

    Good news: Based on my recent checking, your Alexa rank is now 4,217,846. That’s so much better than the 5,329,298 that you got a few days ago. Kudos! πŸ™‚

    • Hi Davaobase! Welcome to these parts! Apologies about the Alexa thing, it’s an inside joke with the crazy influenza bloggers. But you were spot on of course! I like your domain name by the way. Cheers!

  12. ceblogger says:

    welcome to the influenza bloggers davaobase! you are absolutely right about alexa, and the post author knows about it too. but he has his way of making fun at this traffic metrics which confuses a lot of peeps. alexa sinking is a good thing.

  13. Lyle says:

    It’s called humor

  14. bloggista says:

    Hey hey hey you darn blogging Influenza,
    What the hell you’re talkin’ ’bout Alexa?
    Just a concoction ‘o some weird idea,
    Goin’ up bad, goin’ down is delight o yeah!

  15. fatherlyours says:

    just when I thought Alexa is my neighbor. Just kidding. Hi! just dropping by.

  16. DavaoBase says:

    Sheesh! I wasn’t aware that I was making a fool out of myself. Great humor, indeed. πŸ™‚

    Anyway, thanks for the hollers. Glad to check out other people who love blogging.

  17. jan geronimo says:

    @DavaoBase: It’s all right, dude. We had a good laugh about it all right, but it’s a clean kind of fun. We’re more into ripping into each other kind of fun. That’s how we do our bonding time.

    Besides, it’s a semi-private joke anyway. Hey, we’ve got new poems on the front page. Do check it out and the sex quotes, too, if you still have time. πŸ™‚

    Do drop by again sometime.

  18. DavaoBase says:

    Thanks, Jan. πŸ™‚

    By the way, is included in the list of nominees for the Philippine Blog Awards 2009 Bloggers’ Choice Special Award – Mindanao Category.

    (Whew, what a mouthful!)

    Anyway, I am inviting you to visit our website. If you can find it in your heart, do vote for us. Kindly visit this page for more details:

    Again, thanks and more power!

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